Monday: Dateline NBC: Vegas Undercover
Normally, we make a point to shy away from these Dateline NBC specials reports, but, since we’re still on a contact high from watching The Hangover (backlash be damned!), we’ll make an exception here. Chris Hanson, obviously taking a break from outing sexual predators, goes undercover with the Vegas police department to explore the seedy underbelly of Sin City. Expect hookers, pimps, drug dealers and gunrunners. Don’t expect to see Mike Tyson’s tiger. [NBC, 10 p.m.]
Tuesday: HawthoRNe
Nurses are so hot right now! Just a week after the premiere of Nurse Jackie, here comes HawthoRNe, starring Jada Pinkett-Smith as Christina Hawthorne, a tough-as-nails Chief Nursing Officer (hence the capitalized “RN” in the title). We give TNT credit for producing yet another series with a strong female lead (Ms. Pinkett-Smith joins Holly Hunter and Kyra Sedgwick on the network’s roster of ladies), but we’re not quite convinced that this earnest show is going to cut through the clutter. At the very least it might be worth checking out to see Michael Vartan, no doubt fresh out of the Witness Protection Program, in a co-starring role as the hospital’s very own McDreamy. [TNT, 9 p.m.]
Wednesday: Gordon Ramsay’s F-Word
This is the iPod Shuffle of reality shows. F-Word (which either derives its name from the restaurant on the show, or, from Mr. Ramsay’s favorite expletive) combines the elements of no less than five types of programs (cooking, celebrity interview, adventure, competition and even Japanese game shows), and whips everything together to create a constantly entertaining hodgepodge of forward momentum. Unlike his brash and contemptible persona on Kitchen Confidential, here Mr. Ramsay seems decidedly laid-back by comparison. Oh, don’t worry: He’s still overcaffeinated and cursing like a sailor, but, on F-Word, he’s also wildly charming and pretty darn hilarious. To wit: The fourth season premiere features Mr. Ramsay asking former Spice Girl Geri Halliwell how many “balls” she’s had in her mouth at one time. Meatballs, you dirty bird! Though considering this show is called F-Word, we can understand the confusion. [BBC-America, 9 p.m.]
Thursday: The Happening
The scariest part of M. Night Shyamalan’s The Happening isn’t that the Earth’s plant life starts killing us pesky humans, but rather that some studio executive actually green-lighted this patently ridiculous enviro-horror film. No one is safe from this bomb, least of all Mark Wahlberg, who preens like a confused child and winds up being out-acted by a tree. True story! Don’t take our word for it, though: You really need to experience The Happening for yourself. [Action Max, 8 p.m.]
Friday: The Doors
On the list of Oliver Stone’s historical polemics, The Doors is but a footnote. Still, despite being a completely standard biopic, the film has great charms, mostly in thanks to its cast. Meg Ryan plays against type as Jim Morrison’s dead sexy and tripped-out true love; as the Lizard King himself, Val Kilmer is absolutely riveting; and Kevin Dillon does Johnny Drama proud as drummer John Densmore. Victory! [HBO, 3 a.m.]